The Paradox of Motherhood: Loving Fiercely, While Slowly Letting Go

Dear Friend,

Lately, I keep feeling that familiar tug we all know as mums. It sneaks up in the quiet moments—folding tiny socks that aren’t so tiny anymore, watching them run ahead without looking back for your reassurance, and the way they say goodbye with a quick hug instead of lingering in your arms.

Motherhood is full of these little contradictions. Your heart swells with pride and aches with longing at the very same time.

The other day, I was chatting with my sister—our boys are about the same age—and we got all nostalgic about how fast they’re growing up. They’re stepping into that whole new phase of hanging out with friends (minus parents) and becoming more independent. It’s a bittersweet thing—my heart filled with pride, even as part of me is desperate to hold onto the days already slipping away.

It starts with the milestones—first steps, first words, first days of school—those early moments that mark the beginning of everything. Tiny celebrations that feel enormous at the time, and somehow still manage to echo years later.

And then, before you realise it, come the quiet surprises—their sudden insight, a clever turn of phrase, or a question so thoughtful it stops you in your tracks.

You see they’re not just growing taller, but unfolding—layer by layer—into someone entirely their own.

Each moment, whether big or small, feels like a gentle goodbye—to who they were, and to the version of me that belonged to that chapter.

It pulls you in opposite directions.

One moment, my eyes fill with tears as I realise how quickly time is flying—weren’t they just curled in my arms yesterday? The next, I’m their biggest cheerleader, watching them step out into the world, meeting new challenges with quiet strength and excitement.

Because that’s what they’re here to do, and I would never want to hold them back.

I’m their safe haven—the place they return to when the world feels too big. But I’m also the one nudging them forward, teaching them how to meet life with kindness, courage, and self-awareness. It’s a deep, beautiful balancing act—giving roots while helping them grow wings.

It’s a tender, tangled thing—how joy and loss, pride and nostalgia, love and grief—can live side by side.

Maybe that’s the very heartbeat of motherhood: carrying all these feelings at once, woven through the quiet, extraordinary work of helping a tiny person grow into their own story.

t’s a constant dance of holding on and letting go. Hold on too tight, and you might miss the beautiful moments unfolding right in front of you.

That’s the paradox of motherhood: loving fiercely, while slowly letting go.

I don’t have answers—only the knowing that it’s okay to feel it all. Loving deeply often means grieving a little, too. And with every hand you release, every season you leave behind, you make room for something new to bloom.

Maybe motherhood is just that: a thousand quiet goodbyes, wrapped in love, whispered as we cheer them on into who they’re becoming.

So if you’re feeling torn between past and future, between holding on and letting go—you’re not alone. That ache you feel? It’s love doing its work. Let it be there. Let it soften you.

And remember—what you’re doing is sacred, even when it feels so ordinary.

With love, from my little life in bloom to yours,
Gwen

Last Updated May 2025